This is Me

I have memories. Lots of them. They flash in and out of my mind frequently. Sometimes lasting seconds. Other times last for a few minutes as I go into a stupor of a daze to reminisce. My past is littered with bits and pieces that entertain me and with the short amount of time I have left, I choose to put these shards into words to share.

I’ve been to a lot of places and done a lot of things.  I’ve done just about every kind of illicit drug you can imagine. Drank myself into stupor and woke up in places totally unfamiliar to me. I ran away from home at 17, traveled with a carnival, nearly killed in a motorcycle accident, and hitch-hiked to the west coast and back twice. I’ve lived in 6 different states, worked countless jobs, and been unemployed and homeless living in the basement of a church at one time and the kitchen floor of a crack house another. I’ve met and conversed people rich enough to pay off a portion of our nation’s debt and others so poor, a couple coins put in the palm of their hand brought a gleam to their eyes. I spent 24 years driving some of the nicest looking big rig trucks and hauled loads large enough that others move out of my way. I’ve driven to virtually every major city in the continental USA, on every mile of every interstate and most US highways. I’ve been overseas to Japan and Philippines, married and divorced twice, did my time in the military and in jail, and logged nearly 400 skydives. I’ve had so many bumps and bruises and broken bones and had so many lacerations sewn up with so many stitches, that it’s a wonder I’m still alive. I made a major career change at 47 years old, went back to college, made the president’s list and wound up where I am today.

Regrets you ask? I’m certainly not proud of some of the things I’ve done in my life and the regrets I have are few.  I’ve done a lot of stupid things. Some may say I wasted a good part of my life doing stupid things. But those ‘stupid’ things made me who I am today and brought me to this place in time. God was patient with me and has forgiven me for the poor choices I made and has blessed me with a new wonderful life. Today, I have more riches than most. I pinch pennies to make ends meet, wear socks with holes in them, buy my clothes at the thrift store and wear the same pair of shoes 7 days a week. But I have 2 of the greatest boys on earth who are responsible and respectful and I am proud to call them both my sons. My aches and pains are a consequence of my past and a constant reminder I’ll never be as young as I once was. I now admit my time is limited and will need to slow down to soak in what few memories I can find. My future is much shorter now and the end is in sight. But now I feel fulfilled knowing I have a legacy to be proud of, that will follow me.


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